I feel like I really lucked out with my Mr. Right. I mean, I really lucked out.
The other day, my husband cooked dinner. Usually whoever cooks gets to sit out of doing the dishes. But on this particular night, he even did the dishes. I wanted to sing on the rooftops, scream it to every girl I know, “THERE IS A MAN IN THE WORLD WHO COOKS AND DOES DISHES!” When I realized that I was getting overly excited about this situation, I suddenly became extremely sad for girls all over. I mean, we get excited when we find a man who will do dishes. That’s sad, right? What are our expectations for men?
Then I thought about all the other reasons I feel like I lucked out with my Mr. Right: He cleans (himself and the house), he has a good work ethic, he is financially disciplined, he considers and respects what I want, and I genuinely love him.
This shouldn’t be lucking out. This should be the norm.
No wonder why we have TV shows where ABC finds one guy with these qualities and has 25 women pursue him.
I wanted to write this post for two reasons. The first reason is that I want girls all over to know there are men who can take care of life issues, and those are the men they should choose to be with. Second, I want men all over to realize that girls are now going to look for guys who can take care of life issues, so it’s time you all start figuring it out.
Here are five things to consider when choosing your Mr. Right:
1. Cleanliness. When was his last haircut? Scratch that….what I mean is, does he look scraggly? If he can’t take care of his hygiene, how is he going to take care of his life? What does his home look like? Does he own cleaning products? If he doesn’t know what a Swiffer is by now, you can bet he won’t be the one to think of cleaning the floor once you’re married. I’m not suggesting he needs to get a mani/pedis, but its important that some standards exist.
2. Work Ethic. There is a lot to be said for a man who can find a job, keep a job, and excel at his job. It shows he can be dedicated to something. He can work for something. He doesn’t give up when things get tough. Even if he has had a hard time keeping a job (this economy is crazy), does he follow a dream of his? Does he pursue something?
3. Financial Discipline. He doesn’t have to be the richest man in the world; that’s not what’s important. But if he is older than 22 and hasn’t considered a savings account, you might want to see where his financial priorities lie. Before getting married, ask him if he has credit card debt. Ask him how much he has in savings. I can’t begin to tell you how much this will affect your marriage, even if you are doing separate accounts. If he blows his account at the casino, on a big screen TV, or on a new car, the only thing you have for your family is what you are contributing. You want to be able to fully trust that he will be honest with his finances, and you want to feel safe with him having some control over yours. He doesn’t have to be the breadwinner, but he should be able to spend and save wisely.
4. Consideration and respect. It’s okay if you don’t agree on everything, but does he respect your thoughts and opinions? Does he ask you what you want? You know the saying, “Women are from Venus, men are from Mars.” Men will never understand the purpose of a throw pillow. But does he make an effort to see your point of view?
5. Love. My husband is my favorite person in the world. I wouldn’t have married anyone else. If I were single until age 75, then met my husband, my life would be complete. I would rather be single my whole life to meet Davey at the end than to have been with another man the whole time. There is no rush…just don’t settle. Mr. Right is worth waiting for.
So, in my last plea for good-standing men, let’s heighten our expectations of what we deserve, and in response, the men will have to rise to the occasion.